My Dearly Departed

Prompt Day #22: Write a necrophiliac’s love song

This one was SO MUCH FUN! But the thing is, I can’t write songs. I can write poems but they are free form and wouldn’t make a good song. So I channeled Weird Al and re-wrote a popular love song. Since I do not have copyright approval, I sure hope the Goo Goo Dolls are ok with this. It’s really just for my personal growth as a writer and have no intention of performing it or selling it. Giving credit where credit is due: this song is a parody of Iris by the Goo Goo Dolls–one of the most beautiful and heartfelt love songs ever (in my humble opinion). I’ve been reading it to my family as I worked it out. My mother-in-law expressed her grave concern for my sanity and her worry regarding just how sick my mind truly was. I am not a necrophiliac, I simply imagined what they might be thinking about. Forgive me if it offends.

 

My Dearly Departed

 

I’ve been waiting forever to touch you

For the life to fade from your eyes

Your skin to be firm and cool like cement

For your family to say their goodbyes

And all I can smell are the lilies

The formaldehyde’s working alright

When the viewing and funeral’s over

I’ll get to hold you tonight

And I don’t want the world to see me

‘Cause I don’t think that they’d understand

Your lips like a flagpole in winter

Your breasts warm up nice in my hands

And you can’t fight off my advances

And you can’t call me out on my lies

You’re like the mannequin in that one movie

‘Cept that you’ll never come back to life

I’d like to make love to you gently

Then maybe get kinky as hell

I’ll do what I want to your body

Don’t matter, I know you won’t tell

And I don’t want the world to see me

‘Cause I don’t think that they’d understand

You never complain about foreplay

Or tell your friends I’m a 2 minute man

Oh I wish that you could last forever

Without the nuisance of beetles and flies

I’ve been reading the obituaries

Hoping a pretty girl dies

I just want to touch your dead body

I’m just in love with girl carrion

I just want to make love to a corpse

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