Once in a Full Blue Moon

Prompt Day #70: With vivid imagery, describe the process of transforming into a werewolf from the point-of-view of the lycanthrope. At one point in the process, twist it—(s)he’s changing in new ways that weren’t expected. What’s going on?

I wanted to do better than this, I really did but it isn’t easy being a full time doc, full time mom and fulltime writer. The very first chance I got to even take a second to read the prompt let alone work on it was 8:50. Been very frustrated with myself lately. I feel off and I don’t know why. Hope this slump is short lived. The title comes from the idea of a spontaneous genetic mutation, which is a rare event, like a blue moon.

 Once in a Full Blue Moon

I called off tonight. First time ever that I couldn’t work a shift. Something isn’t right though and I can feel it getting worse. I’m sure they’re all pissed. Calling off a midnight shift in the ER during a full moon is simply not done. My head is pounding and my joints are aching. I’m starting this log now because I think I’ve been exposed to some unknown disease and a record of symptoms is essential. This is what I know about the potential exposure:

A month ago, I was working second shift in the ER when a man was brought in. He was completely out of control. Screaming and thrashing. His hands were locked into claws and he gnashed his teeth and chomped his jaws. He howled and swiped at some invisible (to us at least) flying enemy. He was foaming at the mouth. His wife was with him. She said he had lately become obsessed with studying the habits of nocturnal wildlife spending one or two nights a month out in the forest recording his observations. She was concerned he might have been bitten by something.

I attempted to talk to him, and I made the mistake of leaning into him and trying to get his attention. He finally did look at me, and for a split second, we made eye contact and I thought maybe he was still in there. But instead, he bit me. He bit me in the neck, actually managed to tear a chunk of skin off. I had to get ten stitches. By the time I was stitched and back at it, he’d suffered a massive cardiac arrest and died. He was diagnosed with rabies. I went through the series of vaccines and still never missed a day.

I’ve felt fine since—until today. I woke up this morning feeling restless, agitated. All day I have felt like I wanted to jump out of my skin. I paced my apartment until I felt like the walls were closing in. I needed to get outside, I needed some fresh air. I took a bike ride into the city and to the farmer’s market. All the smells there though were completely overwhelming. I couldn’t handle it. It was like they were all fighting for my attention inside my head. Meat, fish, flowers, vegetables, and fruit until finally, when a sweet old woman came up to me with a try of cut up peaches, I shoved her and ran off. I had no control over myself. I just had to get out of there before I wrecked the place. That’s what I wanted to do. I wanted to tear the stands apart one by one.

I got home about an hour ago (3 pm it was) and I was starving. Like I said, I was so agitated, I couldn’t concentrate. I’d forgotten to eat anything. I had a couple steaks in the fridge; I’d bought them for this weekend I have it off and I was going to make them for my boyfriend and I—our two year anniversary. I got them out and heated up the skillet, but they smelled so fresh and cool, I couldn’t wait. I ate them raw. I do not eat raw food. Or at least I never have before. I devoured both of them. That’s not me. Something is wrong.

9:00pm: I took a nap just now, I was hoping maybe I would sleep this whole thing off, but I woke up. My face is aching. It feels and looks swollen. My teeth hurt like maybe I have a sinus infection…except that I am breathing better than ever and my sense of smell seems more acute. The edema in my face is stretching my nose. I feel like someone is pulling my nostrils. Stretching them out or something. I just looked in the mirror. I am having some kind of allergic reaction or some angioedema. My midface is quite puffed out and my nose is stretched. The severity of it is discoloring my face. It has a dark bruised look, almost black.

9:30pm: My eyes are showing signs of jaundice. Yellowed, the irises, which are usually a bright green are now a muddy golden brown. This may be a type of Addison’s disease. My skin is taking on a brown color as if I just spent a few months in the tropics.

9:50pm: hips are stiff and achy, knees feel tight, I want to leap and run. They feel like a rubber band pulled taught. They want release. I looked in the mirror. Face is pulled out, dark brown now. Nose feels different to the touch. Very edematous and spongy, but cool not hot. I feel hot and thirsty. Very thirsty.

10:16pm] fingers ache, tight, hard to move them. not much dexterity.

19;39pp; hitting buttons with long nails now. Taking long time to type. Looked in mirror, turning into animal…wearwolv? Haha. Looks like it. So itchy itchy hair on face and chest. Derek won’t like that hA

11:30pm: trrrying dictation. Wooooorrking better. Howly voice. Hard to nuns in ate. Teeth long ow bide tongue.

MOOOOON: Man was wolf. Am wolf now. But still change. Something else. Back hurt. Shoulders burning pain. Want to hunt, but still change. OOOOwwwww. Pain pain pain. Skin tearing open. More coming out me.

Wings. Leathery wings. I have fingers on the end of the wings, there are much more dexterous. Hard to dictate, but mind is still here somewhat. Brain telling me to kill, eat, blood. Want to tear with claws. Trying to control self. Wild animal inside my brain. Think man who bit me, bit by bat, rabid maybe but made him change, werewolf not killed by bat, but incorporated it into change. Can fly. Flying now. Have a night to use these and going to find something to eat. Have to give in. have to