Prompt Day # 110: Write the transcript for the latest popular talk show, The Creep Show!
The Creep Show
Season 1, Episode 1
Gorey Boneitch: Hello and welcome to The Creep Show a new and exciting talk show that examines the strange and unusual and how it affects everyday people like you and me. First up we have Miss Eve Hyde who has broken off an engagement with her fiancé because she says he has been cheating on her and he is here to admit that he has….with one of her other personalities! (Audience Ooohs). Now, Miss Hyde is in the greenroom with sound proof headphones on. She has no idea that she has other personalities. Henry, her fiancé is here to confess the truth to her.
(The camera shows a spilt screen of a conservatively dressed young woman wearing headphones and a regular joe-looking man in jeans and button down shirt.) Gorey motions and then introduces Miss Hyde. Miss Hyde comes out on the stage.
Gorey: Welcome to The Creep Show, Eve. So you have recently broken off an engagement? Tell us more.
Eve Hyde: Hello, Gorey and thank you for having me. Yes, I broke off my engagement to my boyfriend of five years because I’m certain he’s been cheating on me. (Eve breaks down in tears. The audience Awwwes)
Gorey: Tell us what made you suspect his infidelities.
Eve: Oh, gosh, well. First of all, I should tell you that I am a very firm believer in saving oneself for marriage, so we have never had sex. Nor do I buy or wear filthy, nasty sexualized nighties. Also, I suffer from terrible migraines that often cause me to go to bed early and I do tend to black out when I get them. Henry, my ex-fiance, was always so good about taking care of me when I had one of my spells. But then, I started to find those nasty nighties hidden in my own dresser drawers! (The audience boos) and I found a small make-up bag on his side of the bathroom cabinet and there was bright red lipstick in it! (Again she breaks down crying). Gorey leans over and takes her hand in his.
Gorey: But that’s not the worst of it, is it, Eve. What else have you found in the bathroom?
Eve: There are used condoms in the waste paper basket! He didn’t even try to hide them! (Now the audience is sufficiently riled up)
Gorey: Ok, Let’s bring out Henry and hear what he has to say for himself.
Henry comes out to audience shouts and boos. He just shakes his head.
Gorey: Hello, Henry and welcome to The Creep Show. Eve has been telling us about finding some pretty suggestive items in her home that she says don’t belong to her. But you have something to tell too, don’t you Henry?
Henry: Yes, Gorey, I do. (He turns to Eve and takes both her hands). Eve, I love you, but I have been sleeping with someone else. (She pulls her hands away and he grabs them back and holds them tighter). Baby, when you get your migraines and your blackouts, well, you don’t actually go lay down. You kind of become someone else. You have another person living inside of you. Her name is Sybil. She likes to go out and go dancing. She wears make up and well, honey, she is a fire cracker in bed. (The audience Ooohs, Eve gasps). So, yes, I haven’t kept my vow of chastity, but I’ve only had sex with you, or at least your body, Evey. I’m sorry.
(Eve cries out and grits her teeth. She puts both hands up to her head and writhes in her chair. Then she looks up, takes in the audience, then Henry and lastly Gorey)
Eve/Sybil: Well, well, well, look at all the man candy I have to choose from here. Mmm. How are ya, Henry-doll? Looking good.
Gorey: Hello there, is it Sybil we’re talking to?
Sybil: Yes it is. Who are you? Can I call you Daddy?
Gorey: (laughs uneasily) No. I’m Gorey Boneitch, the host of The Creep Show. You’re currently a guest here with Henry. His fiancé Eve has found out about your relationship and has asked him to come here to confront him. What do you think about it?
Sybil: Haha, Oh dear. Well, where is the poor thing, I’ll clear it all up. I sleep with whoever I want. There ain’t no relationship to talk about. I’m sorry Henry-doll if you ever thought there was more to it than sex. But I have sex with many, many men because I like to, so she’s got nothing to worry about. I don’t steal men but I have been known to kill them. Hahaha.
Gorey: Sybil, did you just confess to killing a man before?
Sybil: Like I said, Gorey, I do what feels good. Sometimes that means having sex and sometimes that means getting rid of a guy who gets too attached. Like this one over here for instance. (She motions to Henry). He was good lay but obviously he is confused about our “relationship” and so, he needs to go. (The audience goes crazy. Henry stands up nervously).
Gorey: Oh Wow, Ok, I think this is a good time for a commercial break. When we come back, We’ll see what Eve has to say about all this and then we’ll meet Rosemary and her son Adrian. Rosemary is suing Satan for full custody of Adrian, a son she says was conceived by a demonic rape while she was drugged unconscious. We’ll be right back after this!