Prompt Day #141: Without naming names, write a piece where your spouse, partner, or “significant other” uses your worst habits against you.
Not my best, I admit. Each verse is stand alone. It doesn’t really flow. I just couldn’t come up with anything…probably because I have no real bad habits! Ha. Plus, look at how petty my husband can be.
Reasons I Want to Kill You
Why must you mumble when you’re talking to me
Wandering around and all I can hear
Is the sound of your voice
Buzzing all ‘round my ear
And it makes me want to strangle you
If you don’t like the song that’s playing right now
Just wait three minutes and it will be done
Quit turning the stations
Holy shit just pick one
Or I might have to drive this car into a tree
I like the fan running so I can sleep
Turn on the blankets that make their own heat!
Do you have to complain
About your damn feet?
Because I swear, I will smother you with my pillow
A long thirteen years that we’ve been together
Dealing with all of your idiosyncrasies
They drive me to consider
But then, admittedly, I’d probably miss you.