On The Sixth Day of Karmas
On December 23, I was on my way to the mall where I was sure to find someone full of the sin of greed. I was so intent in my thoughts that when the light turned green, I neglected to immediately accelerate. The car behind me began to honk and shout profanities at me. He then proceeded to tailgate me the entire way to the mall and when I parked he parked beside me and continued to verbally harass me. I wasn’t entirely prepared to do it, and I hated to in broad daylight, but he left me no choice. I walked up to him nose to nose and quickly jabbed my needle into his neck. I opened my door and helped him in.
I took him home to my house because I didn’t know where he lived. I got him there, stripped him nude and hung him upside down from the beams in my basement. I left him there, collecting lots of blood in his head and hands while I thought.
I heard him wake up later that evening. I still had nothing. I’d been thinking about greed when wrath fell into my lap. Now I had artist’s block. He was screaming now and I thought it best to head down and re-dose him. When I saw him, I knew what to do. His head was a violaceous shade of red and his eyes bulged with burst blood vessels rimming his irises red to match. His hands were ballooned like sunburnt hamburger helper gloves. He was the cartoon version of anger. He was missing only the steam coming from his ears. As he struggled and strained, his conditioned worsened and I had to laugh.
My laughing only served to anger him more and I watched as he finally stroked out, blood flooding his brain. I quickly tied a wire around his neck—tight; important to keep all that angry blood in his angry head. I did the same with his vengeful hands. But something was missing. I needed to see more anger, the clenched jaw that followed me the whole way to the mall. So I cut his lips off and decided his cheeks should go as well, I wanted to see all those pearly whites. I stitched his eyelids open too, you had to see those bulging red-rimmed peepers.
I glued his hands into fists. And I put him in a yellow vest, sitting him in the middle of the intersection where he could monitor traffic as he seemed to enjoy doing. I doubt anyone will sit long at a red light now, they’ll want to get out of there as soon as possible.