Self-Assessment

Prompt Day #223: The vampire knows he can seduce at will, but —having never seen his reflection – begins experiencing self-esteem issues. Dramatize.

With this post, I have finally caught up on my days. I am back on track and hope I didn’t compromise on writing quality to do so. However, I will say that these last few prompts (and unfortunately some coming up in the near future) have been very challenging for me. Some speak to me but the story would be prohibitively long for a daily prompt, some are so difficult, I can barely come up with a scene, let alone a short story. But my goal is to complete a prompt a day, that doesn’t always mean a full story and I have to start allowing myself that freedom. I will be starting an MFA program in writing popular fiction at Seton Hill University in June (i.e. BEFORE I am through with all these prompts) which will require a juggling of responsibilities that I have yet to imagine. Then, I will be starting to work on a Novel and this blog will change once again. Once the prompts are completed, this blog will become a behind the scenes look at the writing of a first novel. What I hope every budding writer can turn to and see what someone goes through day by day in the process.

No, my Muse says she isn’t ready to retire come July.

 

Self-Assessment

 

He floated into her room and stood by her bed. She was a beauty, so pale and fresh in the moonlight. Her jugular pulsed sending off a warm, coppery perfume that intoxicated me. The vampire opened his mouth exposing the syringe-like canines. The girl opened her eyes. She gasped and put her hands up in defense.

“Darling” he whispered. His eyes and sultry voice seemed to immediately calm her. She reached her arms up and closed her eyes. Her head fell back onto the pillow, neck bowed up towards him wantonly.

The vampire stopped, wrinkled his brow. Did she do this because she truly wanted him, or had he inadvertently hypnotized her? He hadn’t meant to. He had been hoping for an unbiased reaction. Why had she put her hands up like that when she saw him? Was he hideous? How would he know, he hadn’t seen himself in a mirror for over 600 years. Weren’t most vampires supposed to be beautiful creatures? But at the same time, didn’t they retain the looks they had before the becoming? He wouldn’t know. His maker was a vampire when they’d first met and he hadn’t really seen him until after he, himself had changed. What if his eyes saw things differently too?

He slapped the girl’s cheek gently.

“My Love, awaken.” He commanded. She opened her eyes and lowered her neck into the pillow.

“Don’t look into my eyes directly.” She began to tremble and he suspected she was about to scream. He put his cold hand over her mouth. “Please, remain calm. I am not going to hurt you.” Did his voice just crack? Did he sound old? Like a mummy or some ancient monstrosity?

“Do you find my hair style attractive? Is it still dark? Can you see grey?” He fired whispered questions at her. “I am going to remove my hand from your mouth and I want you to answer me.” She opened her mouth.

“Who are you? Please don’t hurt me.” She said.

“But don’t you find me immediately attractive? Why not? Is it my skin?” He smoothed his hand across his cheek, it felt ok, but can one even feel their own wrinkled flesh. “I’m 637 years old, how is my skin holding up? You MUST tell me.” He growled at her. He needed answers.

“I…I…Oh God!” Her voice rose higher. She was going to scream. He’d have to bite her soon or leave for good. He grabbed her by the shoulders and shook her. He got down in her face. They were nose to nose.

“Close your eyes so I don’t accidentally mesmerize you.” She did as he ordered. “Now, is it my breath? Does it smell of death? How would I know?” She opened her eyes and with a single look into his, she assumed the position; head back, neck arched towards him.

“No! No! Stop that!” He shook her again. “I am trying to seduce you but you must tell me what is wrong? What color are my eyes? Ah-ah, do not open yours, just think back. Are they green? Are they still green or have they turned black? Red? Milky white? Why don’t you want me?” He was shaking her hard now, his panicked insecurity getting the best of him. He heard the snap of her neck and felt her body go limp.

He threw her body onto the bed disgusted. Disgusted with her but more so himself. What had made her first reaction one of horror? Had every other woman he’d bitten before this fallen under his spell at first sight? It was maddening not to know. He took one last look at the useless corpse and flew off.

Flying through the night, he wondered how he could get the answers he needed. A man? He’d never tried to seduce or even bite a man, but would a man be able to honestly tell him if he was in fact beautiful? Would his hypnotic glare work on a man? A man that would be able to tell him the truth, would probably be the type to fall for his sultry (if they really were sultry) stare.

He looked down as he flew. He saw scantily clad women standing beneath a streetlight. Night Walkers. He could pay them to tell him the truth. But would they lie in order to make more money? And then what? He was not about to take their blood, he didn’t like the taste of blood tainted by STDs.

Did it matter? Really? He could quickly put a spell on any woman he wanted, he had never gone hungry; not for lust and certainly not for blood. Why was he letting this bother him? He wasn’t looking for love, that was ridiculous. But still, wouldn’t it be nice to know you were still relevant? He wanted to know that he was attractive, to know that he was the beautiful vampire the books glorified.

Maybe he would never….Wait! Something below had caught his eyes. A bright flashing light on a billboard. It gave him a brilliant idea. New York City. He would go to NYC and spend his nights attempting to get into the hottest clubs. This would be the best way to know for sure and should he make it inside the dark, loud, pulsating clubs; the blood would flow like the expensive wine behind the bar.

Advertisements